"Doh Ray Me, When Ah Wis Wee"

Traveling around the island of Harris, stopped in a cafe for a wee spot of tea and scones...and there on the table, this children's music book...totally captures the whimsical side of Outer Hebrides life and culture - so much so that it's this blog post's title, because whimsy and culture are what we'll cover here (other very very serious blogs on birds/nature/etc. to follow...).

Written Stuff

The title of this book has cracked us up ever since we saw it. For two weeks now, all one of us has to do is say, "it reminds me of when ah wis wee," to send the other into giggles. The people really do talk like this: I was charmed when a fairly gruff elderly bus driver said that the nature preserve we sought was "just a wee bitty up the road there."  (And as a quick reminder: no, we are not implementing a random text color scheme to reflect the supposed playful theme of this post...it's an identity thing: Juliet's comments are in pink, Phil's in purple.  You can be the judge of what that says about us. Though I really really wanted to be yellow.  That may say something else entirely. But that doesn't show up on-line well. )

This is the back of a Scottish 20 Pound note. If you click on the image to see it full size, you will see a map that looks just like something out of The Hobbit or some other work of fantasy. The land of Ibibio, is it on good terms with the kingdom of Ikoi? 

And here's what you find on Page 3 of a major Scottish newspaper (carefully masked to make it Safe For Work). I wish the New York Times would start doing this; I bet it would help the sales of their print edition.   By now it's clear that Phil has an odd affinity for images like these.  I absolve myself of all responsibility & blame here.  These do nothing for me, and if you have complaints, take it up with him.  I'll back you up. 

"If you have any problems, queries, complaints, suggestions or comments" please contact these people, or leave a note using the notepad and pen provided. This is in a public toilet, in a tiny town of maybe 30 residents.  As it happens, we did not have any problems, queries, complaints, or suggestions, but we did leave a comment:  "Thank you for taking such good care of this facility.  We really appreciate it!"  Try finding a sign like this anywhere in a US public toilet.  Oh, and there was a jar next to the toilet for leaving a small donation, if you were so inclined (we were).  Coins all piled up in a small heap, open top.  Just love a place where you can do that.

Animals

These shaggy cattle were very interested in my bike. The one on the right liked the sweat on my saddle and handlebars (he licked the saddle clean, then tentatively gave the handlebars a try); the one on the left figured he must be missing out on something good so he came over too, but since he only sniffed at the wheels and the pedals he never figured it out. 

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. (Or, if not greener, it's sweeter.)

These are not just meerkats being displayed at a small agricultural fair in Scotland, 10,000 miles from where meerkats live; these are meerkats carved with a chainsaw!  (Chainsaw carver was a huge draw at the ag fair, discussed further, below.)

Vegetables

So we went to this fantastic local agricultural fair one afternoon in Tarbert, on the Isle of Harris.  The big event of the week for the community (July 4, no less!).  Maybe 300 people there, total - including a few of us tourists.  "Big event" takes on a whole new meaning when you're in places like the outer Hebrides.  And we learned important new things about the local culture here.  One highlight was the two or three small tents set up to showcase the local produce, agricultural items - and then just other stuff. Not entirely clear how it related, but nice anyway.  I don't think I am exaggerating when I state that probably everyone who entered something in the competition got some kind of prize.  

Agriculture prizes: the potato category.  Winners for, "4 potatoes round, white" are on the right.  Then of course you have, "4 potatoes white, kidney" and "4 potatoes coloured, kidney" on the left.  I really didn't even have to write that out for you, did I?  You just knew that's what was going on here...

We weren't sure whether we should start a new section for these, or leave them in "Animals", because these are "Animals Made from Vegetables." This was, I swear, an actual category at the fair. 

Sheep made from cauliflower. A worthy winner. 

Carrot feet and beak, mushroom and grape eyes, eggplant body and wings. Auk? Puffin? Penguin? Perhaps it is the inability to identify the exact animal that relegated this to third place. 

And who among us can challenge the winners of the "Decorated Wellies" category?  Not me. Not you. Because not in a million years would any of us be able to decorate plain old wellies as well as this.

Food

I have never before seen cooked pancakes in a grocery store. I bought a pack and I must say they were just fine! Why don't we have these in the U.S.?  Because, no, they are not as good as fresh-made pancakes.  Not by a long shot.  This is like the notion of, "why don't we just dump the canned tomato sauce on the spaghetti and say it tastes just as good as fresh-made?"  Oh that's right - Phil used to say EXACTLY THAT when I first met him. OK, first, that is a scurrilous lie: I never said canned tomato sauce is "just as good", I said it is "plenty good enough."  And so are the pancakes. By Juliet's logic there would be no canned tomato sauce in the U.S. because it's not as good as homemade; but in fact there IS canned tomato sauce in the US because it is "good enough", and there should be packaged pancakes for the same reason. I rest my case. 

Not actually whimsical, really.... Juliet and I sampled many sticky toffee puddings. We are both big fans, and we both think some are much better than others. Here is pudding number 4, served with ice cream. A solid effort but not top tier.

People

Tarbert agricultural fair again. These are tiny kids on tiny 4-wheelers doing tiny laps on a tiny track. 

Would you believe the wind at the top of this hill was so strong that it held me in this position? (Well, you shouldn't, because it wasn't. It was damn strong, though). 

Juliet got tired of posing conventionally for photographs, so she started doing wacky things when I pointed the camera at her. Here she is at the ferry landing...

...and here she is at a "beehive house," a structure of unknown age (we were unable to find information about this specific structure in our guidebook or online, and the basic design was in use for well over 2000 years, until as recently as about 150 years ago).  Phil is demonstrating a sad lack of artistic, cultural, and historical knowledge here. EVERYONE knows that I am doing the legendary - yet spontaneous - "beehive-dwelling-dance," passed down through the ages from one beehive dweller to the next.   Usually prompted by blue skies and sun (which can be a rare occurrence in the Outer Hebrides), and by finding said beehive dwellings after a rather long march through boggy peat, up and down hills, with a disastrously poor trail description in hand.